Competing Charity

It seems to me that at the very hint of competition, charity disappears. To me, they seem exact opposites. Let me give you my definitions; it will help a little.

Charity: the desire of one person to help another being out of love and, in the act, forget oneself.

I think this is any and every situation where we feel we should do something or say something to another person because we deeply KNOW it is a selfless act that will help that person in the way they need it the most. I want to note- It is sooo hard to follow this impulse! I just had a feeling today to say something to a family member that was simply a thank you and I didn't do it. This person has done a lot of work for me and my whole family for the holidays and I have seldom volunteered help without being prompted. To my knowledge, a sincere thank you may be the sign that this person has not done all this work in vain. Outside of my knowledge, this person could have a bunch of problems and need a simple message of: I see you, I hear you, and I love you. I don't have a good excuse for not saying thank you, though I'm sure I could come up with a whole slew of excuses that are just waiting to make me feel better but the fact is: I had the feeling I should say it and I didn't because of my own weaknesses.

Competition: using a comparison of oneself to another person in order to emphasize one's own strengths and the other person's weaknesses and create a hierarchy with one's self at the top.

I think this can be any tiny, tiny inkling of resistance to another person's needs and vulnerability. It doesn't have to be any action, though it usually leads to some competitive activities, whether in gaming or in every-day activities.

While I don't think that every motion that is not charitable towards another person is strictly competitive, I do think that competition is either at the base of the movement or will evolve from it.

And think about all the topics that, in their very nature as we use them in society, encourage competition! Religion, race, politics...

I have seen that you can talk about any of these edgy topics under the guise of philosophy without the same depth of competition, if we are willing to let go of those indoctrinated communications that we are so used to.

Maybe it is not even so much the label but the way we have become accustomed to communication within those labels. We get stuck in these ruts of seeing only the path before us, and if the other person does not travel in our same path of dirt, we simply are blinded by the dust of our own frantic feet, as we try to make our destination. We become so focused on the things we want to say or things we think that we leave no room for the views of other people and that literally eliminates truth from existing in our experience of that conversation.

How many times is that our experience in everyday life? What are we missing out on because of it? How much do comparison and competition interfere with the charity that we are all capable of?